"Cop couldn't find his fucking couch, the living room."

“Then I'm over the fucking top and you owe me a Cadillac. And I don't want any fucking shit and I don't give a shit.”

“We don't have to worry about making it interesting; all we have to worry about is getting rid of the pig.”

“Where have you been, Shelly? Bruce and Harriet Nyborg. Do you want to see the memos...? They're nuts... they used to call in every week Did you see how they were living? The people are insane. They just like talking to salesmen.”

“My alma mater is the Chicago Public Library.”

“What the hell are you? You're a fuckin' secretary. Fuck you. That's my message to ya: fuck you and kiss my ass, and if you don't like it baby I'm going across the street to Jerry Graff, period, fuck you. Now, I want you to put me on the cadillac board and I want two promising leads and I don't want any bullshit and I want them close together because I am going to close them all, and that is all I have to say to you!”

“You cheated on your wife? You did it, live with it. You fuck little girls, so be it. There's an absolute morality? May be. And then what?”