"The truth is that the world is full of dragons, and none of us are as powerful or cool as we’d like to be. And that sucks. But when you’re confronted with that fact, you can either crawl into a hole and quit, or you can get out there, take off your shoes, and Bilbo it up."

““You’re just getting old.” She gave a dramatic sigh. “Truly, all the more’s the tragedy; the second thing to go is a man’s memory.”

“Nothing makes a man feel older than a young woman.”

“Like all boys my age, I was an idiot when it came to women.”

“Fear tends to come from ignorance. Once I knew what the problem was, it was just a problem, nothing to fear.”

“It’s like this: if you have one piece of cake, and you eat it, that’s fine. If you have two pieces of cake, you should probably share some with a friend. But maybe not. Occasionally we could all use two pieces of cake. But if you have a whole cake, and you eat *all* of it, that’s not very cool. It’s not just selfish, it’s kinda sick and unhealthy.”

“Mauthen ain’t much for listenen. Nothin’ plugs a man’s ears like money.”