Chris Rock on Family
Browse 7 quotations attributed to Chris Rock, catalogued under family, with dates where available.
This page displays 7 quotations attributed to Chris Rock and filed under "family" in QuoteLineage. The selection is ordered by stored importance and quality scores, not citation counts. A topic label describes how an entry is catalogued; it does not establish the theme's importance in the author's work.
Attributed to Chris Rock, entry #69856: "Remember when we was young, everybody used to have these arguments about who's better, Michael Jackson or Prince? Prince won!"
Attributed to Chris Rock, entry #27859: "I don't give a fuck! So, what!? Motherfuck the tiger! I'd be shot in the tooth, motherfucker! I don't give a fuck about your bee-otches!"
7 Quotes by Chris Rock on Family
"Remember when we was young, everybody used to have these arguments about who's better, Michael Jackson or Prince? Prince won!"
"I don't give a fuck! So, what!? Motherfuck the tiger! I'd be shot in the tooth, motherfucker! I don't give a fuck about your bee-otches!"
"I try never to brag but I'm probably the only person who has been on 60 Minutes twice and isn't dead."
"I mean, they don't grade fathers. But if your daughter's a stripper, you fucked up."
"Oh the abortion issue, it's a woman's issue. When a woman get pregnant, she don't want to hear shit from the man. Fuck you, motherfuck you, I don't need you. Unless she decides to have the baby and she's like, "Where my check?"
"There's nothin' a white person could ever say to me that will ever catch me off-guard. Ever! I'm always lookin' for some racism! No matter where the fuck I'm at, I'm like "where the racism at? Where it at, where it at, where it at?" No matter where I'm at. I could be sittin' down with Regis Philbin, doin' an interview, talkin' about Madagascar 2, sayin' "yeah, Regis, Madagascar 2's real good, man. I play a zebra again! Oh, this motherfucker's great!" And right in the middle of the interview, Regis'll pull a pencil out of his pocket, stab me in the neck and say "take that, ya fuckin' nigger! Take that, ya dirty, greasy nigger! Take that, ya fuckin' nigger!" And I'd be like "I shoulda seen it comin'. I let Regis get too close." I'll be mad at me. I'll apologize--"hey, man, I left my neck all out, man. I'm sorry, man, I'm sorry."
"If you haven't contemplated murder, you ain't been in love. If you haven't seriously thought about killing a motherfucker, you ain't been in love. If you haven't had a can of rat poison in your hand and looked at it for forty-five minutes straight, you ain't been in love. If you haven't bought a shovel and a bag and a rug to roll their ass up in, you ain't been in love. If you haven't practiced your alibi in front of the mirror, you ain't been in love. And the only thing that's stopped you from killing this motherfucker was a episode of CSI: "Oh man, they thorough. I better make up. They might catch my ass."