Samuel Butler (novelist)

"A little boy and a little girl were looking at a picture of Adam and Eve. "Which is Adam and which is Eve?" said one. "I do not know," said the other, "but I could tell if they had their clothes on."

"Nothing will ever die so long as it knows what to do under the circumstances, in other words so long as it knows its business."

"Animals and plants cannot understand our business, so we have denied that they can understand their own. What we call inorganic matter cannot understand the animals' and plants' business, we have ther…"

"Always eat grapes downwards — that is, always eat the best grape first; in this way there will be none better left on the bunch, and each grape will seem good down to the last."

"Argument is generally waste of time and trouble. It is better to present one's opinion and leave it to stick or no as it may happen. If sound, it will probably in the end stick, and the sticking is th…"

"One of the first businesses of a sensible man is to know when he is beaten, and to leave off fighting at once."

"To love God is to have good health, good looks, good sense, experience, a kindly nature and a fair balance of cash in hand."

"Memory and forgetfulness are as life and death to one another. To live is to remember and to remember is to live. To die is to forget and to forget is to die."