Robert Asprin

"“You know,” Malcolm remarked to no one in particular, “I’d say that chap doesn’t enjoy time travel."

"All the years he’d spent fooling himself into thinking that what he did was correct was simply time wasted from his life, on delusions and fantasies that kept him from seeing what he was and where he …"

"The more I learn about history, the more savage I find it was."

"“Education,” he smiled, “is never a waste of time."

"It is jihad, Mr. Morgan, a particularly virulent, fundamentalist form of hatred."

"“He’ll get a life sentence for the illegal trafficking alone and probably a death sentence for the people he killed along the way.” He sighed slightly. “I always did fancy happy endings."

"Bull Morgan was just the right man for the job, a man who found the law useful in how far it could occasionally be bent to save a friend."

"But—as Kit and Sven had been so fond of saying—the Universe didn’t give beans for “fair.” It simply was. You got it right or paid the price."