"Whom are you?" he said, for he had been to night school."

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More by George Ade

“Moral: Don't try to Account for Anything.”

“In the city a funeral is just an interruption of traffic; in the country it is a form of entertainment.”

“MORAL: If it were not for the presents, an elopement would be preferable.”

“She was a soprano of the kind often used for augmenting grief at a funeral.”

“MORAL: When Wealth walks in at the Door, the Press Agent comes in through the Window.”

“A Piker always has his entire Stock of Goods in the Show Window.”