"If you attack the establishment long enough and hard enough, they will make you a member of it."

Art Buchwald Politics See all quotes by Art Buchwald →

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“People are broad-minded. They'll accept the fact that a person can be an alcoholic, a dope fiend, a wife beater and even a newspaperman, but if a man doesn't drive, there's something wrong with him.”

“I like champagne—because it always tastes like my foot's asleep.”

“Don't commit suicide, because you might change your mind two weeks later.”

“The powder is mixed with water and tastes exactly like powder mixed with water.”

“Just when you think there's nothing to write about, Nixon says, "I am not a crook." Jimmy Carter says, "I have lusted after women in my heart." President Reagan says, "I have just taken a urinalysis test, and I am not on dope.”

“You can't make up anything anymore. The world itself is a satire. All you're doing is recording it.”

Resonant Thoughts

"I've kind of fallen out of love with politics. … Whatever experience and talents I've gained over the years — I think it may well be that the highest and best use of that is to try to bring enough awa…"

— Al Gore

Politics1948

#family

"For a revolution, in order to be a true revolution, must be a world revolution. To achieve that world revolution, you the children of the Yankees must lend a hand. You must vomit forth your cynicism i…"

— Abbie Hoffman

Politics1936–1989

#family

"Some people think love is the end of the road, and if you're lucky enough to find it, you stay there. Other people say it just becomes a cliff you drive off, but most people who've been around awhile …"

— Colum McCann

Literature1965

#time

"It should be obvious that the criticism of this opinion serves not to present counter-arguments, but to discredit and attack me because I've deviated from the prescribed path. In his intriguing and th…"

— Clarence Thomas

Law1945–2011

#knowledge