"The one function that T.V. news performs very well is that when there is no news we give it to you with the same emphasis as if it were."

"Are there any niggers here tonight? Could you turn on the house lights, please, and could the waiters and waitresses just stop serving, just for a second? And turn off this spot. Now what did he say? …"

"There is no advance without strife."

"War was to be entered upon with sadness, with regret, but also with ferocity."

"I never lie, even to this day. Not even a little. Unless you count playing pranks on people, which I don't. That's comedy. Entertainment doesn't count. A joke is different from a lie, even if the diff…"