"I wish that the people who sing about the deeds of heroes would think about the people who have to clear up after them."

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“My programming language was solder.”

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“Out of Print" is bookseller speak for "We can't be hedgehogged.”

“If I heeded all the advice I've had over the years, I'd have written 18 books about Rincewind.”

“I always thought Detritus would be good at: "I bet you're wondrin' how many time I fired dis crossbow”

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