Alan Sugar

"My history of lending money from banks is that they want to know the ins and outs of the backside of a duck."

"Sian Lloyd – what was she doing there? Why did you cast and pay for a kind of celebrity for your advert? You know, I could understand if your advert was based on weather, I could understand if your ad…"

"Most of the people I do business with are mature businessmen like me, and they are not going to take kindly to being spoken to like a wash woman in the street!! ."

"When it comes to bullshit, they have forgotten what you haven't already learnt about all this crap! ."

"I came from an environment where I needed to succeed. There was no wealth or anything like that in the family. Not that we were paupers, but we had to fend for ourselves. Kids today are not as hungry …"

"I tell you what, if any of you survive here, I promise you this: As sure as I have a hole in my bloody arse, when it gets down to the two of you, all these people who are saying nice things about you …"

"If there was a market in mass-produced portable nuclear weapons, we'd market them, too."

"But I've sat here four times, and there is a message coming from above....not that I am a believer in the Lord or anything.... ."