"It's alright, I'm not going to steal your breakfast you fat prick."

“Joey Barton at Soccerbase”

“When people talk about my dark days, when I sit down and think about it - the misdemeanours I've had, with the things that go on in the real world, - the things I have done are stupid and foolish. But they are not war crimes. That's what gets me. When footballers are on the front page and on page seven is something about soldiers dying or floods or the real tragedies in this world, I ask myself how we can justify that.”

“England did nothing in the World Cup, why are they bringing books out? 'We got beat in the quarter-finals, I played like shit, here's my book'. Who wants to read that? I don't.”

“You have to face facts. We have not brought quality in. One or two have done all right but not enough to take the team onto the next level. We can't gamble on players who have scored six goals in six games in the fucking Pontins League or in Belgium. I know a lot of the supporters are umming and ahhing about whether to buy their season tickets. They go out and work hard. It is a lot of money to buy a season ticket at our place and they are not getting value for money.”