humor

"The safest road to Hell is the gradual one — the gentle slope, soft underfoot, without sudden turnings, without milestones, without signposts."

"The Jew is not a disturber of the peace of any country. Even his enemies will concede that. He is not a loafer, he is not a sot, he is not noisy, he is not a brawler nor a rioter, he is not quarrelsom…"

"No, Travaglio kills no one. With a knife. He uses a weapon much more refined and unendictable in court: the archive."

"OK. We're on the sofa. We look at the scene. We take a second look. We focus on Travolta. This is an athlete. His reflexes are on a hair trigger. He can deal with several enemies at a time. He can duc…"

"In Qubã’ there was an unmarried Muslim woman and he noticed that a man used to come to her in the middle of the night and knock on her door; she would come out and he would give her something. He felt…"

"We shall respond to every Chechen shot with thousands of our own."

"It's all done with gears. Also pinions, snails, arbors; pawls and ratchets; and cam followers; cables, levers, bell cranks, and pivots."

"The colour, noise and festivity failed to elevate Carfilhiot’s mood; in fact—so he told himself—never had he witnessed so much pointless nonsense."

"Football is nothing without fans."

"Show me a pretty girl with the world stuck to her and i'll bet you there's a brother that's tired of fuckin' her. lots of nigga's girls is someone else's one-night stand"

"And you can spit-shine your shoes Pittsburgh, you're going dancing with the Lord of Lords, Lord Stanley!"

"it is always a genial laughter. Not at mere weakness, at misery or poverty; never. No man who can laugh, what we call laughing, will laugh at these things. It is some poor character only desiring to l…"

"A liberal is someone who feels a great debt to his fellow man, which debt he proposes to pay off with your money."

"You told your mother I was gonna blow you up with a fucking pumpkin bomb? What did she say?" "She. Was. Terrified. She wants me to move home."

"During the war he was an airman and slaughtered civilians from on high."

"It is very common with individuals or estates when they run into financial difficulties, to find that they have to sell some of their assets. First, the Georgian silver goes, then all that nice furnit…"

"Moonlighting was funny, innovative, genre-busting chaos. Also, apparently, unsustainable. Sigh."

"3061. Idleness makes the Wit rust."

"339. Hee that lies with the dogs riseth with fleas."

"descent with modification"