humor

"If you ever saw a policeman with a club in his hand, I want to ask you, did you ever see that policeman club a millionaire? But it is "Get out of here, damn you, go on to jail, damn you," if it is a w…"

"A career is wonderful, but you can't curl up with it on a cold night."

"I'm able to paint so nice and thick with those big splodges that stay upright because I mix my own paint. I use the formula that the seventeenth-century painters used and I've added one or two things …"

"Most games that we are approached with are too close to existing open source games for us to publish... we have no real desire to compete with open source products."

"Treat a child like a witch and you’ll have one."

"Well, there's nothing funnier to me than the French. The French Resistance is probably the biggest mythical joke that ever existed. There were four guys in the French Resistance. They couldn't hand ov…"

"'When the war with the Rajputs was over, Aurangzeb decided to leave for the Deccan. His march seems to have been marked with the destruction to many temples on the way. On 21 May, 1681, the superinten…"

"You are not angry with people when you laugh at them. Humour teaches tolerance, and the humorist, with a smile and perhaps a sigh, is more likely to shrug his shoulders than to condemn."

"Cruelty walked the Warrens holding hands with poverty and rage."

"3515. Necessity dispenseth with Decorum."

"But with the morning cool reflection came."

"I like to hold a monologue with women. But a dialogue with myself is more stimulating."

"Cui weiping Twitter account in Chinese"

"The role and function of backbench politicians deserves to be treated with respect."

"Missionaries of Charity Active and Contemplative Sisters with U.S. contact information"

"$2.3 trillion with a "T." That's $8,000 for every man, woman, and child in America."

"“The bias that they now reflect, is that of the Globalist Left. Of the Establishment, with a capital E”."

"So, in my relationships with men, I’ve always sought suffering, conflict, and despair."

"Tinkety tonk old fruit, and down with the Nazis."

"Never say a humorous thing to a man who does not possess humour: he will always use it in evidence against you."