humor

"I have had luck with my St. Bernardino, not only with the experts, but with the public as well. Without any reservation, everyone is on my side. The King expressed his satisfaction before the whole Co…"

"It's like an act of murder; you play with intent to commit something."

"As has become the custom, a wearisome one I admit, this invitation has not been without controversy. Though this unfortunate, this controversy has added little value in the calculus of my decision to …"

"I could stuff a pillow with the amount of confetti I have had thrown at me. And could I sleep easily on that? No."

"All floated upon an evening carrousel, with fitful drifts of music wafting up here and there, and voices calling and murmuring from houses that were whitely haunted by television."

"I goggled. Her words did not appear to make sense. They seemed the mere aimless vapouring of an aunt who has been sitting out in the sun without a hat."

"Kinna-Uganda has something to do with mediocrity. We should follow the trends of other industries like Hollywood, Bollywood and Nollywood; let us call our films Ugawood."

"Military related Karl von Clausewitz quotes"

"There are hundreds of families in the UK who earn over £60,000 in benefits without lifting a finger because they have so many kids ."

"There's no such thing, like a female with good looks who cooks and cleans."

"With that truncheon thou hast slain a good knight, and now it sticketh in thy body."

"2009 interview with Icculus"

"Don't spend another evening with the sex cantaloupe."

"I looked down at the chessboard. The move with the knight was wrong. I put it back where I had moved it from.Knights had no meaning in this game. It wasn't a game for knights."

"The principal object of management should be to secure the maximum prosperity for the employer coupled with the maximum prosperity for each employee."

"It is the business of culture to make us able to consider with intelligent interest all real opinions, even those we do not and can not accept."

"…The king struck Hemu with his sword and he won the title of Ghazi…"

"‘The flower,’ said Bernard, ‘the red carnation that stood in the vase on the table of the restaurant when we dined together with Percival, is become a six-sided flower; made of six lives.’"

"I respect her talent and her brain and who she is as a person — and that kind of admiration and respect is a big factor in binding someone in a relationship. I know what a good heart she has, and how …"

"Tim Berners-Lee on Twitter and identi.ca"