humor

"You look into the fiery furnace, see the rich man without any name."

"There is no doubt that we cannot do without variable quantities in the sense of the potential infinite. But from this very fact the necessity of the actual infinite can be demonstrated."

"There was no religious ceremony connected with marriage among us, while on the other hand the relation between man and woman was regarded as in itself mysterious and holy."

"No. If I am in such a temper, then the person I am in a temper with needs to leave."

"You done got with us niggas--now you talking about, "You fucked up my self-esteem." Bitch, it's called SELF esteem! It's esteem of your mother-fuckin' SELF, Bitch!"

"An ugly woman with a gun is a terrible thing."

"Mr. Chadband is a large yellow man, with a fat smile, and a general appearance of having a good deal of train oil in his system."

"Paul Bowles, A Conversation with Bruce Duffie"

"Temptation: seeds we are forbidden to water, that are showered with rain."

"In walls of masonry the first question must be with regard to the sand, in order that it may be fit to mix into mortar and have no dirt in it. The kinds of pitsand are these: black, gray, red, and car…"

"If evolution was worth its salt, it should've evolved something better than "survival of the fittest." I think a better idea would be "survival of the wittiest." At least, that way, creatures that did…"

"Nannie Bruce, a tall, gangling light-heavyweight with a suggestion in her appearance of a private in the Grenadiers dressed up to play the title role in Charley’s Aunt, was one of those doggedly faith…"

"Certainly no general ever did more with less; in every way, he was one of the great captains."

"...men, groping in the Arctic darkness, had found a yellow metal, and because steamship and transportation companies were booming the find, thousands of men were rushing into the Northland. These men …"

"...the company must not throw money away on huge bonuses for executives or other frivolities but must share its fate with the workers."

"No, Mr. Bush, you just stay the course. It's not your fault that 30 percent of New Orleans lives in poverty or that tens of thousands had no transportation to get out of town. C'mon, they're black! I …"

"My first memory of Nirvana was getting a cassette of demos, which ended up becoming Bleach. Everybody's response was that this was an amazing band and these were amazing songs. It was another indicati…"

"Life is funny. Life isn't categorized into comedy, drama, action, is it?So I don't know why they try to categorize everything. It drives me crazy-why it would have to be just a romantic comedy or... I…"

"There is a deep connection between Bernoulli's dictum and John Kelly's 1956 publication. It turns out that Kelly's prescription can be restated as this simple rule: When faced with a choice of wagers …"

"I've played Bach since I was a little girl. I can't let a day go by without playing him. He's so witty and secretive and funny and mathematical and brilliant."