"I suppose it's no surprise that we feel the need to dehumanize the people we hurt—before, during, or after the hurting occurs. But it always comes as a surprise. In psychology it's known as cognitive dissonance. It's the idea that it feels stressful and painful for us to hold two contradictory ideas at the same time . And so to ease the pain we create illusory ways to justify our contradictory behavior."

"The sum which two married people owe to one another defies calculation. It is an infinite debt, which can only be discharged through all eternity."

"he genuinely oppressed—as opposed to the hustlers of faux outrage—have always known freedom of speech to be their best friend."

"My mother saw herself as a victim. Once upon a time she had shaped her future and made decisions -- she had left Somalia for Aden, divorced her first husband and chosen my father--but at some point, i…"

"I'm wicked, as you say, and I'm rude and I'm boorish and I discovered, after marrying Mr Scaddon, that I could be all these things and worse and that there would still be plenty of people to lick my b…"