"pride myself on the fact that my work has no socially redeeming value."

“Going to a sensational murder trial is the only way I can relax.”

“Life is nothing without a good sense of humor.”

“I would never want to film hard-core pornography, because it always looks like open-heart surgery to me.”

“Parents should worry if their children haven't been arrested by the time they turn sixteen. Being a juvenile delinquent is a birthright and as much a part of healthy adolescence as smoking cigarettes or getting pimples.”

“Waters might, once upon a time, have been a candidate to be the American Buñuel, especially when he had the raw hatred of Divine under his command...”

“I'll never be able to do a sequel to Pink Flamingos because it would have to end with Divine taking a shit and the dog eating it.”