"I hate housework! You make the beds, you do the dishes—and six months later you have to start all over again."

Joan Rivers Entertainment See all quotes by Joan Rivers →

React to this quote

More by Joan Rivers

See all

“I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw that my bath toys were a toaster and a radio.”

“Never floss with a stranger.”

“Before we make love, my husband takes a pain killer.”

“A man can sleep around, no questions asked, but if a woman makes nineteen or twenty mistakes she's a tramp.”

“I succeeded by saying what everyone else is thinking.”

“My obstetrician was so dumb that when I gave birth he forgot to cut the cord. For a year that kid followed me everywhere. It was like having a dog on a leash.”

Resonant Thoughts

"The more injuries you get, the smarter you get."

— Mikhail Baryshnikov

Entertainment1948

#art

"That general warrants, whereby any officer or messenger may be commanded to search suspected places without evidence of a fact committed or to seize any person or persons not named, or whose offense i…"

— George Mason

Politics1725–1792

#art

"I see kids and how young they really are and I cannot imagine them coming on a boat by themselves, going to another country to work and be separated from their parents. It really humbles me and makes …"

— Ali Wong

Entertainment1982

#art

"At some point, I stopped and made the following note to myself: I have never finished a story. I'm beginning to see that now. I don't think that there's ever a point where a story or novel is just exa…"

— Caitlín R. Kiernan

Literature1964

#time