"I was lonely driving here tonight so I hugged the road."

Jay London Entertainment See all quotes by Jay London →

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“I was born nine months premature.”

“I went to an audition the other day, they were casting 13 people to be clouds. 14 people showed up, it was overcast.”

“At Motel 6 in Amish Country I wonder if they leave the light on for you?”

“I'm addicted to prescription glasses.”

“I don't need to worry about identity theft because no one wants to be me.”

“Flowers for $25.00, reluctant. Wining and dining for $150.00, catastrophic. Trying to get on first base, unattainable. For everything else there's Masturbate.”

Resonant Thoughts

"I accidentally wound up at this "dance...place", gentleman clubby place. I wasn't driving, it was an accident; we pulled up to the place, ya know , ah! I knew where I was, you can be drunk and know wh…"

— Gabriel Iglesias

Entertainment1976

#love

"You know in your hearts that at this moment — a moment that will define a generation — we cannot afford to keep doing what we've been doing. We owe our children a better future. We owe our country a b…"

— Barack Obama

Politics1961

#time