"My auntie Nora right, all her food is mashed. She's got teeth but she don't need 'em"

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“I think some bacteria have better lives than that”

“Now Hilda, she was your bog standard old woman.”

“If you had 5 photos of anuses, I could not point mine out”

“You know that guy Richard Blackwood? He went in for a colonic, live TV. Never seen again.”

“Whats good with a holiday right.. say if you work in a factory from 8 in the morning till 8 at night, packin socks into a rubber bag right.. between 8 and.. what time did i say he finishes?”

“If you live in a glass house, don't be chucking stuff about. - Karl interprets the phrase Those who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones.”

Resonant Thoughts

"If the slavery of the parents be unjust, much more is their children's; if the parents were justly slaves, yet the children are born free; this is the natural, perfect right of all mankind; they are n…"

— Thomas Paine

Politics1737–1809

#family

"Right now, the theme is "Sex In The 80s", which must've been an exceptionally hard sell round Channel 4 towers. Mullets! Tits! Duran Duran! More tits! Bigger mullets! Ha ha ha! All you need is a few s…"

— Charlie Brooker

Literature1932–2020

#philosophy

"I guess the contortionists are cool right, very impressive, they're doing stuff we can't do. But for me, once you see the gay guy bend over and fuck himself, I'm done!"

— Kathy Griffin

Entertainment1960

#identity

"I love Iowa, and I'm going there right after this, going up to New Hampshire, I'm going to Iowa because I want to win Iowa. Everyone says don't say that. Just say you're going to do well. That's the c…"

— Donald Trump

Politics1945

#love